As I was watching him blissfully go back and forth across the gym floor, I realized that I feel just like him sometimes. When I have several days in a row that I don't have busy things planned, my life feels like it has no direction. I do one thing for a little bit, like work on one of my scrapbooks, but very soon I wonder if there isn't a more important thing I should be doing. But nothing comes to mind. So I'll pick up one of my crochet projects. After a little bit of crocheting, I will again feel like what I'm doing is pointless. I'll read a book, and by chapter 4 I will be bored out of my head. I will grab a rag and spray bottle and attack the bathroom (since that is my favorite room in the house to clean). An hour later, my bathroom will be sparkly, but my heart will still feel lonely. Unlike the baby crawling around in the gym tonight, I will be fully aware that I'm going in unproductive circles.
So I pull out my kindle, or click the Power Bible button on my computer, or gently open my non-digital Bible--whichever one is closest when I finally realize what's been missing in my life the past few days. And I sit and read. I let God remind me of how much He loves me, even when I forget about Him. My heart soaks in His promises, and my life's purpose becomes clear again. I live to please God. I live to worship God. I live so others can see Jesus in me. I beg for God's forgiveness for forgetting Him, and I plead that next time my life gets hectic, I would forget something much less important from my schedule.
I remember growing up all the times I walked into the living room in the wee hours of the morning thinking that surely no sane person would be up yet only to find my mother sitting in her chair, reading the Bible or praying over her list. That knowledge that my mom was always on speaking terms with God was such a reassurance throughout my childhood. If I only succeed in one thing in life, I want it to be that my son grows up knowing that his mom is always on speaking terms with God, too. Which means, among other things, that I need the discipline to not let my life get too busy for Him. Now that I have a blog, I am going to use that to my advantage. I hereby declare every Sunday to be Sharing Sunday, where the post for that day will be about what I learned or was reminded about in my devotions the previous week. There. Now I'm accountable to whoever reads this post, and if busyness tries to keep me out of the Bible, potential mass embarrassment will bring me right back, and once I finish Numbers :-), that renewed sense of peace that fills my heart after being in God's Word will convince me to come back for more tomorrow.